Happy HUMP Day!
Yes, I put the word "HUMP" in all caps. I've just been in that kind of mood lately ;)
Remember back in the day when someone made you a slow jam tape? They'd title it something simple like..."Slow Jam Tape"...or "The Quiet Storm" - written with a sharpie on a piece of tape stuck to it. Ah...the good ole days.
Slow jam tapes were the ultimate form of flattery. If someone took the time to make you a slow jam tape (think: insert tape in cassette deck, stay up late to listen to The Quiet Storm for songs you like, press play and record at the same time. Stop. Repeat with different song), he or she REALLY liked you. That's right up there with love notes that read: DO YOU LIKE ME? Check one box - YES...NO...MAYBE. :-)
Music can enhance various aspects of our lives. The right music can create a sense of timelessness that will provoke a flashback, highlight an experience, or cause a chill to run down your spine. In romantic situations, the right music on the slow jam tape is essential...vital...critical even.
What is the right music? Some might argue that it's whatever music you like. Not so. I like Jay-Z, Biggie and The Roots - however, the music these artists have created isn't going to fit the criteria in this case. Some pieces of R&B, classical or jazz DO fit the criteria, however, other pieces do not. Lyrics that speak only about sex may be appealing to one person, but may not necessarily be conducive to the mood you're trying to create or the message you're trying to send - especially from an intimacy point of view. The slow jam tape was created for making love.
So, what is the criteria for music chosen as the soundtrack to lovemaking? The music should flow like waves crashing against a shore, or like the rising and falling of breath. The rhythms should be a mixture of staccato - smooth yet chaotic. If the pieces have lyrics, they should be about timeless love - or captivating, as with story telling, yet not distracting. The words could be obscured by the music...cryptic...or in a language the lovers don't understand. There are a few songs that have the strange illusion of being slower than the actual tempo, but have a vibe that you'd get down to. Songs with this illusion are perfect for slowing down the pace, but not too slow...building to climax, yet prolonging the experience.
When two lovers are first together, every sexual experience may seem significant. So choosing to get busy to songs you hear everyday on the radio may not do the session justice. If you're creating music to enhance lovemaking, make sure your effort doesn't lack soul or heart or sound too commercial. Personally, I prefer music that was created specifically for ME, because someone had to take the time to think about me, us, our experiences together and the memories we try to create...if only for one night.
The playlist on my blog includes some of my favorite "slow jam" songs that have specific memories attached to them - from my years growing up listening to my mother groove in the living room long after my sister and I have gone to bed, to my freshman year in college when I lost my virginity, up until now. They evoke feelings that make the hair on the back of my neck rise and tickle me, and my soul sings along.
In this day and age, the perfect gift is a pre-downloaded iPod that your lover has infused with music that helps induce a sexy mind-state unique to the both of you. They shouldn't just be "love songs" or "sex songs" - but songs that illicit and spark a response so nostalgic, you get OPEN every time you hear them.
Sure, strictly sex songs have their place...but not here...
...not on MY slow jam tape.
What's on yours?
-b
